Time to Own It!

       After years of writing and even after earning my Bachelor of Arts degree in English I am just now realizing I am a writer. What do I mean by that? Well, I have alway loved writing, but I am realizing now that I have treated my writing as a hobby, and not much more. 

       I currently work an office job.  It is not what I dreamt of doing growing up, but I have always had a hard time knowing what I really want to do.  I guess a part of that is that I never believed I could do what I love. I never had enough confidence in myself as a writer.  And I realize now, I have never really, truly thought of myself as a writer.  I was a girl who liked to write; there is a difference.

       Recently I have been reading writing blogs and I am currently reading, The Arist's Way by Julia Cameron and Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg.  I have discovered kindred spirits.  Their descriptions and expressions of the writing life and process so truly resonate with me, and suddenly, I realize who I am. It's time for me to own it; I am a writer.

        As part of this new discovery I have decided to stop viewing my writing as a hobby because it is more than that.  Every artist can understand the power in the call to your soul that creating has.  It is almost like the real you lives deep inside you where the world can not see and creating, for me writing, is a way for that inner soul to breathe.

       Since my writing is no longer a hobby it is time to get serious.  That is why I have started reading blogs and books on writing.  I believe real writers read.  Every writer must be in a constant state of learning.  Writers watch the entire world and then interpret their observations and their understanding in the form of stories, poems, prose, plays, etc. 

       I suppose another reason why I never wanted to completely label myself a writer is because I was afraid.  I was afraid that by admitting I was a writer and by taking my writing seriously, that I would find out I wasn't up to par.  I was afraid of failure, but you never know if you can fly if you don't jump.